well, this is one of the best shorts on newgrounds so it's really hard to critizise, but because you asked for it i will try to be the most nit-picky possible and give you some tips.
i really like the fluidity of the movements and the colouring is amazing, the story flows very naturally, i can't really find anything bad in the overall short film.
the are some very particular things though that could be improved.
for example when she spits, i only saw when watching the third or fourth time that shes spitting on the fire demon. maybe some more anticipation or a more spectacular 'death' of the demon wouldve helped.
and i found it kinda weird that under water she's suddenly lying on her side.
the dutch angle when shes swimming could be confusing, as if she'd swim up a hill.
and all your transitions are great, some even downright amazing. the in the last one though you couldve darkened the screen gradually with the burst 'expanding' instead of a smash cut to black where you didnt need it.
but probably most of my critique could be argued about since it's really very nit-picky.
great to see you're alive and well ;)
You nit-picky bastard - no just kidding ; )
Thanks for taking time to write all that!
I agree with the spit sound. I even tried to crop the picture or make the sound stronger but that just made it worse... conceirning the water angles I tried out what seemed most dynamic.
Good to hear from you and see you soon I hope!
great to see you decided to officially publish this project. still looks as great as ever and the music adds to the atmosphere. can't wait to see more from you!
definitely one of the best entries to newgrounds in 2016. apparently at least the 5th best ;)
really love everything about it, the animation, the art style, all executed pretty masterfully. i was only a little confused by the first half of the short, because there's almost no continuity of movement between the shots. i'm still learning and don't know anything about action films, but is there a rule of thumb on how to use continuity of movement? i'd really love to learn about how to make action scenes :)
ahah good eye. i took quite a number of shots out. black dude wearing overalls had a segment where he gets thrown, and the transformation sequence was removed as well to keep the film close to 1 minute. originally planned for 3 minutes, but the deadline for this school project came quicker than anticipated :p
it really bothered me how the necks were reddish, whereas the faces were coloured in a shade of yellow. it looks so weird haha
however, you really did a massive step forward! the animations are smooth and wonderful to look at, the background is drawn very skillfully and you built and incredible atmosphere. if you keep improving like this, I'm very excited for what you will release in 2016! :D
Thanks so much very fair critique! I can't wait to show newgrounds what I got!
you're pretty swell
hey well thanks, so are you :)
sounds like this could become a great game, i love how atmospheric the trailer was.
but unfortunately this doesn't work very well as an exposition, because it doesn't really make sense. why has knowledge become a weapon? why are the fights still physical then? and why did you chose a characterdesign that looks cool, but makes even less sense?
I'm really excited for what you'll present to us once this thing is finished, but so far I'm just left with a bunch of questions.
Thanks for the comment! I totally see where you're coming from, and you bring up very good points. Things like why knowledge became a weapon, 'physical' fights, and even the character designs have all been thought out. I feel giving you the answer to all that now in text would be unsatisfying for both you and me, hopefully you'll stick around to discover the answers for yourself on release. Or maybe you'll be able to piece it together before then with the upcoming content we have planed.
Either way, thanks for the comment and I hope to hear more from you in the future.
"what the fuck overall" sums it pretty much up, but that's what I love about all your animations!
appearently bensapphire lost his last 30 brain cells, since his review is pretty shit. It's not you best work, but since it's one of your oldest shorts thats only natural.
keep it up!
Thanks! I appreciate it!
Very beautifully made, I really love the whole atmosphere of this short. You really managed to create an elaborate animation, very smooth and well drawn. I just feel the story could have used some more thought (it bothered me a little, that he didn't just tie the ballon to the cross?).
however, for the short time you had it's really amazing!
I actually thought about him tieing the balloon to the cross but I only ended up thinking of that AFTER I had animated him putting the stick in the ground and I simply didn't have time to change it. Thanks for the critique! :)
you like folding people
"cause the players gonna play, play, play
and the haters gonna hate, hate, hate"
- beyoncé, 2014
there is no wire on the telephone. you though noone would see, but i did. sorry, but for sloppy work like that i just can't give you full points.
everything else was flawless
You got me.
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